Poodle Delights | Dogs haiku poem example | 121008

My poodle delights,
pouncing on his first
sheet of ice.

Ken Wagner on Haiku Habits

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  • Kris Dec 11, 2008 @ 13:48

    I like this one – a vivid, funny, image and a nice half-rhyme.

    I get the impression a lot of twitter haiku writers don’t do a lot with the sound of the words, but from the transliteratoins of Japanese I’ve read, the original poets did.

  • Ken Wagner Dec 11, 2008 @ 20:08

    Thanks for the feedback, Kris.

    Rocco the poodle just hit one year. He loves everything, but is especially fond of leaves, ice, and snow. He has been a great – if exhausting – companion in my haiku practice.

    I am trying to pay attention to sound and rhythm – not just the image. Your encouragement means a lot.

  • Dave Dec 15, 2008 @ 22:19

    I agree with Kris. I only worry that “delights” might be a little too abstract – though I do like bringing in the narrator’s own emotion. If it were me, I would’ve stayed focused on the dog, but that’s not necessarily the best or most haiku-like way, I think.

    I admire the risks you’re taking here. I wish more people used their blogs this way.

  • Ken Wagner Dec 16, 2008 @ 23:41

    Dave
    Perhaps “delights” is too vague, because the emotion I was trying to capture was the dog’s – he was delighted.

    I admit to being amused at the moment, but the discovery was all his.

    Thanks for your thoughts on the blog process. I thought it would be useful to capture the development of a struggling haiku-er. Perhaps it will also track the emergence of a new personal sense of awareness and action. Or not!