A Passing | Nature haiku poems examples | 020509

A gull’s call
answered by a passing
cloud.

A gull’s call
answered by a passing
bus.

Ken Wagner on Haiku Habits

Comments on this entry are closed.

  • Dave Bonta Feb 5, 2009 @ 21:51

    I vote for #2.

  • devika Feb 5, 2009 @ 23:04

    I liked both, Ken

    The first very poetic..
    the second kind of life-like

    wishes,
    devika

  • Dave Bonta Feb 6, 2009 @ 7:33

    See, to me the second one is actually more poetic.

  • gautami tripathy Feb 6, 2009 @ 11:36

    For me too, the second one is more poetic.

    bus drives over
    the edge-
    gulls call out

  • Ken Wagner Feb 6, 2009 @ 21:31

    A haiku poem
    answered by a passing –
    poet!

    In combination, I thought they were a bit of a haiku spoof.

    The mundane nothingness of the cloud transforms into the unexpected force of a bus.

    After all, this should be fun, no?

  • devika Feb 6, 2009 @ 21:37

    Hi Ken,

    There I agree —
    And after all this blogging is also fun, no!?

    To me commenting is fun, but I am serious with my blogs 🙂

    Visit sometime when you are free– the second last is a haiku —

    http://devika-jyothi.blogspot.com/

    wishes,
    devika

  • devika Feb 6, 2009 @ 22:01

    it should all be fun, if haikuing and blogging is all about fun 🙂

    thank you, Ken

    wishes,
    devika

  • borut Feb 7, 2009 @ 3:05

    Why not, yes, why not
    Walk along death’s icy brink:
    Live fully – have fun.

    Which is just an attempt to paraphrase the much quoted (here) line of Colonel Sir Richard Burton, the 19th century British explorer, soldier, diplomat, translator, writer, poet and, last but not least, dervish of the Kaderi Order:

    ‘We dance along death’s icy brink, but is the dance less full of fun.’

    The paradox: how can one, time-centred as we are, answer the call of timeless life!?:)

  • Crafty Green Poet Feb 7, 2009 @ 12:30

    I like both, I like the different scene set up by each of them, I like the fact that this post encourages the reader to think about how small differences in the words in a haiku can make so much difference to the perception of the scene.

  • Ken Wagner Feb 8, 2009 @ 17:38

    Devika and Borut – A dance, indeed!

    Crafty Green Poet – Yes, small differences do matter. In haiku, as in nature. Thanks for pointing that out.

  • comradeharps Feb 9, 2009 @ 7:06

    I like the contrast of the combo. Nature and human. Because even buses are good. Nice.

  • Ken Wagner Feb 9, 2009 @ 20:39

    comradeharps – Yes, “even buses are good.”

  • krisha ebora Jul 28, 2009 @ 3:32

    gift of nature

    a blooming flowers.
    it is a gift of nature.
    it is beautiful.

  • noreen Oct 19, 2009 @ 6:27

    Its not a haiku poem, is it? its about nature and need three lines in 2 stanzas